Friday, March 13, 2009

Juggles..juggles...

It's been very hard for me to find a time to blog. My semester is almost finish but the exam will be after the easter.Thinking of that, I will not have enough time or as i cans aid, quality time for study as Aqil will also spending his time at home during the easter and my exam starts right after the easter holiday. Need to find someone to take care of Aqil since his nursery will be having away day on our first paper.Hopefully there will be Malaysian families which will not be going anywhere since the school will be closed as well during that period.

Being a mom cum wife cum student, yeah quite challenging and sometimes i almost giving up because i could not tolerate the pressure i'm having right now. On the other hand, thinking of the hard ways I went to through to get the financial support and to get here, I motivate myself to be more determined to achieve my goal that is to complete my study. Even my result will not be as good as my undergrad, I feel that, it is worth it than nothing.At least, i didn't fail any subject so far if considering my condition as compared to other students. But, it is never my excuses of neglecting my studies.I've tried on my very own best, with all the effort i have to get the best result i could. Well, only me know how i'm struggling to manage the family and studies and of course, when married, you will also having upside down quite sometimes and have no one to tell the stories behind it.

There were quite sometimes I was really in stress which I could not described here and it refreshed my memory of my past and it made me cry non-stop. I am the one whom when started crying, it's really hard to stop me.I feel sad when thinking of my good time while study which i did not appreciate that much.I realised that I have wasted lots of time during my undergrad which i forgot to appreciate my social life to the fullest. Ended up, I think, I don't have really such a best friend which will always with me, whom is a part of me. I have always search for this kind of friend and it is really hard to catch one since everyone has their own bestfriend which i don't want to steal from. That would be my very last wish list as i can understand how it is really hard to find a dearest friend in the world and once you meet her...you will never let her down/go. But, I do have few good friends which i fully appreciate their kindness to me, and i regard them as my best friends no matter how they regard me.

Aqil and toby--look what's written on his tee...

Back to my family life, we have now realised that we want more people in our family...hehehe...and am trying to bring one..hopefully it will work well, if not..means, belum rezeki and have to work hard for next year financial plan..ceyy..Aqil is now a grown up todd, very helpful but sometimes very cranky.I had to stop him from breastfeeding session forever since he's already grown up.I feel relief even though it is a paksa-rela kind of approach. It has been 4 days i think, never once he asked for it and in fact, when ever i offered him, he will say..."x cedap..kerahh..."...i don't know why "kerahh" means so many things to him...hahah..he is really funny...and i really love him so much though he is sometimes cry out loud to the maximum volume he has....

Big fan of Thomas..