A brand new year 2010!

What will be your resolution for a new year that will begin in couple of hours?Me?Long ago, i've always set up few resolutions for a new year but none have been accomplished.LOL..so, for me, there's nothing significant to set up new resolution, yet, i feel good that I am still alive to live in the next new year. Years passing by and it has been already 4 years plus, i've been married and left my hu-ha life. And also, have been 3 years plus of being a mother which I am still in learning process. Yeah, everyday before sleep, i wish to become a better person for the next day, a better mom for the next day and a better wife for the next day..I've always muhasabah before sleep so that I'll always remember my mistakes and not to redo them again..I've always did this since i was in school...while in school, before sleep, i plan for tomorrow schedule..and what should i do better for my studies...hehehe...

However, this is going to be the first time, a new year eve without my hubby, he is away for now for tool inspection (i wish i was there..as i love doing the job that he is doing right now!!!).Actually, we never celebrate new year..just happy to see the fire works before..on tv of course..we never like to be in the crowd...the last fireworks we saw was during KKP...that was in the year we got married..heh! I wish to be in KKP fiesta again and bring my kids to play...how i wish my hubby is an outgoing ones! LOL! (better not..if not, he will always be with his friends rather than with me and the kids kan2??)..I like my hubby to be with me all the time...with the kids...hahah..(ade mcm queen control x???..hihihih)..But now, he is starting to have some times with his colleugues (betulke eja nih) to play games (this is permitted as this is good for health kan???)..I have no objection on this. For me? I would like to have girls day out but...I have no close gilfriends which want to go out with me??(pathetic kan i ni??) No lah..it was just before, i never been out with them..and i guess they feel that its really hard for me to hang out as i'm already a someone's wife and kids mom....but i managed to go out once then, so happy but so tiring because i was 8 months pregnant!!..So, penatlah berjlnkn!Hope to meet the gilfriends again someday!!

What i want to do next?I've set up my mind to make over my house..but not now...still juggling with the new baby and old baby(old??)i've always dreamt of having a cozy comfy house which i can relax after having hard times with officeworks. Now? My house is like abandoned ship jer!..Toys everywhere..and even the furniture..we still using the old ones which are most of it temporary ones!..I've asked my hubby to change them..but he is still searching and now..searching for a new house??? WHAT?? I don't feel a need now since I'm already OK living in the condo for now..not so soon...as if landed house..must be a 2storey right??..and with small kids...owh..I really don't want to have 2storey house...turun naik tangga...leteh!!!!but good for exercising yeah??..heheh

Enough of writing...I hope this coming 2010 will bring good to everybody...:)..HAPPY NEW YEAR...(yg bestnyer..cuti..tp xdpt kuar berjln jugak...hishhh...)

Selamat pengantin baru!!

1 Muharam ritu, bertukarlah title abg saya kepada suami org. Alhamdulillah...sy sgt bersyukur, akhirnye beliau bertemu jodoh jugak, dpt org dekat, cikgu pulak tu...mmg idaman kalbu beliau...itulah hikmah nya bila sy membantah hub beliau dgn seorg trainee di tpt beliau bekerja dulu, pasti ade yg lebih secocok buat dia..malangnya, sy pulak masih berpantang dan kurang bertenaga di hari penting beliau..itulah..org dh suggest buat pas raya xmo..nk gak 1 muharam...nak sama hari dgn my parens nyer nikah ler tuuu...hihihi...makcik2 pulak sibuk berbisik, rupa abg sy sebijik cam rupe abah ms muda2...iyeke??...tp rs sy, abg sy mmg awet muda...even adik bwh dia, abg ngah nampak lg tua dari dia...tulah merokok lg...kan dh nampak cepat tua...hihihi..so, dlm kami 4 beradik..tinggal seorg lg yg bujang...ntahlah...bila nk kawen pon xtahu...mujur lelaki...

Berbalik pd cerita hari penting..sebenarnya..mcm2 sy plan..tp sume xjadik psl sy kepenatan menjaga anak kecik dan besar ini..bukan mudah beranak kecik ni kalau tiada pembantu...tp sy tegar...masih xnak terima maid...sy cuba utk melakukn sendiri tanpa maid..sbb, sy mls nk tambah masalah lain dlm keluarga kecil sy...

Sungguhlah ramai org yg kawen bulan disember..mn tidaknye.wiken2 sume cuti pjg kn..mmg molek dibuat majlis kawen mawen ni...kendian..bersambung ke januari pulak...xpasti lah dpt menghadirkn diri ke tidak..sedikit worry nk angkut anak kecil ke kenduri kawen...kalau family sendiri atau kwn rapat..ok lg...mungkin leh demand nk tpt yg selesa utk lepak berbf...mcm ms kenduri abg sy, sy duk dlm bilik..bila bb tido sy turun bwh..sungguh penat berumah 2 tingkat..naik tangga turun tangga...bb sgtlah baik...asyik tido jer...bgn bf then tido..xbyk ragam...sungguh baik memberi kerjasama...

Balik dr ipoh..oh..bb sgtlah meragam..xtahu kenape...igtkn ade hantu in the house..melalak2..then xmo tido mlm kt dlm bilik...xtahu kenape...agaknye xsuka lampu kuning ke??..bila bwk ke ruang tamu..elok tido...atau nk tido berdakap ke..eh..ini mmg xbuleh dibiasakan...susah kendian hari...awal2 dulu senang..letak je dlm cot...tido lah dia...skang...teknik tido meniarap pulak...tp kene selalu tgk2...lama sket tido nyer...kalau x..letak je..bgn...tido paling lama pon sejam...dah bgn...nk berdakap...aduhhh..mmg lenguh...sabar jelah...mujur kt rumah sendiri...selesa...kalau kt rumah parens...mau PND semula...mcm ms first pantang dulu...

Alkisah fridge....

Tepat kul 10.00 mlm local time,on christmas eve, suddenly my fridge was out of order. We've tried to plug in into other socket in the kitchen, as well as testing the socket with my phone charger. The phone charger was working. Therefore, we concluded the fridge was broken, maybe its motor. The first thing i worried for, was my expressed milk that i kept in freezer for after confinement consumption. They are a lot and may take months to stock up that much. That time i was writing my post in this blog. Then i logged in my YM and chat with my friend, asking what i need to do to save my milk.

Then hubby went to 7E and get some ice cube, and we put all the milk inside it and put inside the freezer back.After that, i was wondering what would cause the fridge to break down in the middle of the night? The fridge was only 4 years old..then we started to blame each other...'duit xberkatlah'..'ms beli xikhlas niee..'..huhu..mcm2..but after all we were making fun of ourselves...lucky our sons had gone to sleep..so, less pressure...i started thinking of that if motor was the cause, then, we still have the warranty..but where did i put the warranty??..we started to search for it but couldn't find anywhere...i guessed we might accidentally throw it away while gathering all the unused items in the house...

Then, i just 'tawakal', with the hope, all the milk will still be frozen..

The next morning, hubby checked the freezer and found out milk was still OK.And we try to find resolution to our fridge problem...buy a chest freezer or small fridge, whichever the lowest...then, get our fridge repaired..as it is a toshiba...not a 'cikai' one..Then, hubby went out...while he was out, my mind keep questioning..'nape nk rosak??'..then i felt thirsty...intend to make milo...so i have to boil some water...i get my kettle and plug it..but it was not working..then i tried the same socket for my rice cooker..also not working...then i tried other socket in the dining hall...and..the kettle was fine!!!

Quicky i rushed in the middle room to get the only long extension that we had.I plug and connect it to my fridge..and..the fridge is fine too!!!...Oh my dear...'napelah xterpk mlm td???try socket lain dulu...dok igt fridge rosak..mustahil rosak...bukan fridge jatuh ke ape...penat je hubby kuar g 7E mlm td and i risked my susu2 mlm td...isk3...'

So, lesson learnt..be cool and don't panic, think first of possible causes then action..haha..berguna kan ilmu electric electronics yg blajar ms kt skolah kn???..kemahiran hidup???...punca nya...hubby ade biarkan 1 socket open..xmati kan..and i guess they are all connected kt kitchen...so..live wired x matikan..so..die short circuit.....;p

Baby baru vs baby lama..

Since i had two kids in the house..mula2 OK..but after traveling tu..horror babe..but now..i'm getting into it..alhamdulillah...my anger is under controlled..my energy is back to normal..Alhamdulillah, my decision for this second delivery was very worth it..i feel more energetic as compared to the first delivery..maybe because i did not take any drugs or medication except antibiotiks and ubat nak yak2..ehehe..seriously...energy mmg cpt pulih...just that, my stitches tu quite long i guess and rs sore because i walked too much because need to visit my son at the nursery due to jaundice...

Baby Asif was delivered normal with weight slightly more than 4kg, just slightly..but the size was the same as Aqil.I was delighted I managed to deliver him safely as many said that my size is too small to deliver big babies...and i prove it wrong...inilah kuasa Allah...:)..but bb Asif kuar xnanges..kene paksa nanges..barulah menangis...same like Aqil..xnanges gak...after a while baru nanges..muka dia merah...bdn pon merah....and it was said, ms kuar tu...cord lilit kt neck dia...wallahualam..bila tgk gambar ms die baru kuar..xnmpak pon cord around his neck...

Aqil is so syg to Asif, can't tell in words how much Aqil lives his bro.Always kiss his bro sampai lemas menengoknya..but rs xpatut pulak nk tegah as, this is the time to connect both of them...mudah2 rapatlah diorg as sibling...:)..Aqil? still like baby....but i love to see him..a lots of tough time i went thru with him that unforgettable...Aqil was really tough...yet he is really 'manja'...


Aqil ms umur 1 month plus


Asif ms umur 3 minggu lebih

Rupa paras..still not confirmed as muka Asif berubah2 dr hari ke hari...he is still merah...and even Aqil pon berubah2...ape pon..hopefully both of them will grow up dan menjadi hamba Allah yg beriman dan anak2 yg soleh...Amin....

Pantang sendiri???

Gambar hiasan...Asif masih dlm perut...missed this place very much!!

I am still in my confinement period, however, this time, i'm doing it all by myself, no mom around, i'm taking care 2 kids in the house all by myself. I feel more comfy when staying at my own house rather than be in my parent's without hubby by my side. I had experienced it once during my first confinement, where i got terrible PND when hubby was not around. Then, after 2 weeks, I asked to be at home and my excuses during that time was to have Aqil first paed visit..hihi..and this time, my mom did not ask anything since she knew her dotter is really stubborn and independent.

Be a mother of two, actually, it was fine before i went back for my bro wedding. My stress level was OK, xde mrh2..but..after the wedding, we had a night time travelling, and i was so exhausted for many days..mengantuk xigt sampai xlrt nk bgn nk mandikn anak..it was really tiring..and i swear, never travel during early weeks of my confinement...or during confinement...better be at home and take of yourself...after this, no more traveling until further notice..dekat2 OK...but if a journet takes more than hour...OMG..kematu bontot....

I am easily get my anger bila penat2 ni..so yg jadi mangsa..Aqil..pantang wat slh..mesti i naik hangin..before..i cuba utk bersbr...dan guna sikologi kt dia whenever he makes mistake...now, i'm trying to get to normal...just like before the traveling took place..but...Asif is kind of 'manja'...need to be hold for a long time until he fall asleep..and now, my left arm dah lenguh...camne xlenguh..dok carry almost 5kg baby....Asif is quite a big baby for his age..he managed to gain 600g in 2 weeks...myself?..belum timbang lg..but last time...50kg..wah3...but perut..masih belum surut sepenuhnya..any tips??? nak kempis spt muda remaja dulu???heheh....

lain2 kesakitan...alhamdulillah..all gone...only that...worry of my perut...bila nk kempis ni...xceluih kebayaku....huhuhu....Asif still in his redness....his true color xkuar lg...kaler ape agaknye ehh??...ehehe..anyway...Aqil is really helpful...sgt syg kat Asif...always kiss his adik and now...sgt bijak berkata2...his sentences both in english and bahasa are really improving...however...masih ade lg sifat penakut dia...huhu..

i am glad i have given birth to these two wonderful boys and i am proud that having a husband that really understand my requirement for this second delivery...(barulah rs xserik nak beranak lg utk sayang!!!..ehehe)...I really love my 3 heroes of my life...Asif, cpt2 besar...mama nk bwk jenjalan gold coast~~~..ehehe....(entry ida berjln ke gold coast sgt megujakan...nnt aku follow up dgn ko ehh ida sume psl gold coast..tp lambat lg lah....)

Experience of using TENS Machine during labor..

My contraction was not really felt and i've decided to admit into hospital on 1st Dec just in case there might be a little opening or contraction which i didn't feel. I was on CTG and everything was OK and the Doc advised me to go home and wait until labor came. However, I've decided to get induced as I think, i might not feel the contraction as I think my bb love being in my tummy. And also, another reason is, i might not have sufficient time to recover rapidly since my brother wedding will take place on Awal Muharam..so, really need to recover fast.

Then, the Doc agreed to send me to maternity ward and had the induction tablet in. I really don't like it as when everytime they check the opening, however, this time around I'm glad because it was not as frequent as the first one which really put me into stress and the results, i was having bad postnatal depression and phobic. I really like the way the Doc compromising with me, really love this Doc which is really sporting and fullfilled my dreams to have the labor without any drugs..alhamdulillah..only during the stitching, she put some anesthetic injection as that already passed the delivery.

What did i use to relief the pain? I've requested to use my own TENS machine and the Doc allowed me, with the help of physioterapist, she put all the 4 electrodes on my back and with the brilliant understanding of the instruction from my hubby, I was able to control the machine myself. Actually, I intended to use this machine form the first pregnancy, however, it is need to be rented and the rental fee is quite expensive and I have no idea how big the machine is. And while in UK, I've studied about this machine and many have used it and recommend it. Then, I've decided to buy one for my own as I am going to use it for every pregnancy in future.Even it is costly, but, i really love it..plus, the electrode is sold in the hospital pharmacy as this machine is also being used for physioteraphy purposes.

I started to use it when i was in the labor room, after the water bag rupture by the Doc, I really don't like it, I guessed my "Vjj" has gotten very sensitive after the first pregnancy as during the first one, I'm OK when ever they put their hand inside my "Vjj".This time, I really like 'cacing kepanasan' and feel like want to knock the person out...hehe..Alhamdulillah I passed all the contraction very well with the help of the machine. But this machine is only recommended to those who can bear the real pain of labor, the Doc said I have very high pain treshhold, I don't know, but I think, my mom must be higher than me I guessed.And many others has high pain treshhold as it is said that the no 1 pain is the labor pain...

I tried to think of other thing but I can't.And that is why i feel very sore after the delivery..psikology also plays role in pain relief..if you have a really good brain nerve distraction (apa ni - meaning that u easily get distracted to other thing and forget about the pain) then, it is really good...

So, get yourself one TENS machine, it can be used not only in labor but for other thing as well. CEPAT2 PESAN pd diorg kt UK tuh....lots of choices...worth buying!!!

Short update...

Mesti ramai yg tertanya2, apesal lah xupdate blog ni..hehe.actually, i've tried to log in from the officce but was blocked, i can only read blogs but can't log in into my blog to give update..that is why blog ni dah berusang selama lebih 2 months after i returned to Malaysia..and now, i am in maternity ward, being induced, as the bb doesn't want to come out, happy playing inside my tummy i guess..so i've decided to induce today as it is already passed the EDD..there's none in my family history, anyone passed the EDD too long..doc told me to return...but i pity my husband dah amik cuti...so induce jelah...again..my dream nak rasa the thrill going to labor xdapek gak...xperla...belum rezeki lg...hehe...so tumpang happy dgr experience kwn2 yg dpt rs saket sebenar nk going to labor...

hmm..cite psl balik ritu...haih..mcm bunyi dah berlapuk pon ade...sampai 1 september..treus lepak sat kt hotel psl dah sedia maklum rumah kotor...and also, saya ni allergic habuk..so tuhlah pasal tido kt hotel one night...esok nyer cek out baru balik rumah....ok lah...just berhabuk je...mmg tebal...lantai itam....huhuhu...jenuh gak nk membersihkna..yerlah dgn jet lag lagi kan...haha...dgn rs bahang nye KL nih..maklumlah...baru sampi dr tpt sejuk...so..cepat2 psg aircond...psl mmg xthn panas...Aqil pon naik ruam2 semula...terus tuka pakai singlet je hari2...huhuh...

To be continued...psl tgh thn contraction and dah lenguh dok atas katil....nk berjln2....

Menghitung Hari...

Tak berapa lama dah nk tinggalkn tanah UK...or lebih snang...nk tinggalkan scotland...Macam2 bende kene setel dihujung2 masa ni..tiket flight..alhamdulillah..dah setel walaupon overbudget (marah kt sponsor - book lewat!!)..tp xperlah..janji dpt balik on the day...cume flight terawal siket dr plan..so..hmm..ape yer nk buat ms tunggu transit yg tersgtlah lama...dahla dlm keadaan pregnant...kalau tak tu..ok lagi nk pusing2 airport...tp bukan ade bende pon airport heathrow..best lagi KLIA...(patriotik la konon)..

Hmm...rege minyak kt UK makin naik la pulak..mujur nk balik dah...kalau x...asyik mengisi minyak ajer...dahla s ni suke jalan2...dan mmg xpuas berjln...tp xperla...xde rezeki nk jln2..dah orgpon xnk bawakkn...apelah daya nk pergi sendiri2 dlm keadaan macam ni...hrp2 nnt adelah rezeki nk tgk2 tpt org...Amin....

Last bits shopping...ha...xpuas2 lagi shopping...biasalah..konon nk perabis pound sterling cap scotland..kisahnya...talipon bank2 kt Malaysia..diorg hanya terime duit pound yg ade gambar ratu..lol!..so..kiterg pon berusaha memikir camno nk habeskn duit2 scotland cash ni...macam2..mcm xde nilai pulak...ish3...xpsl2 disuruh tuka ke euro/USD atau pon withdraw kt england...keskeskes..macam2...ptt ade simbol pound tu..betul lah tu duit pound...haih~~..

Baru ni bli la persiapan utk bersalin...alat utk thn saket..hrp2 dpt digunakan nnt..kalau x..sia2 jer beli..anyway..masih buleh dipakai utk perkara2 lain jugak...terutama slps bersalin...mula2 bid kt ebay...tp asyik kalah jer...last2 bli terus kt supplier..brand new lagi..so costnye...mahal lah....tp xperla...just once off, hrp2 berkat lah duit yg digunakn utk beli tu..leh guna hingga ke anak bongsu..berape org ehh???..hrp2 ade la terjual electrode die kt KL..kalau x segan pula nk memesan kt org2 disini...hihihi...lupa nk tgk ade tarikh luput x electrode tu...kalau ..leh beli siap2....snang..xmenyusahkn org lain..

Ha akibat hobi bershopping...dah skang saket betis...sungguh2 saket..nk jln pon susah...tp ttp nk berjln2...kisahnye..hari ahad lps g carboot kt town...sekali lif rosak...kenelah turun tangga...dr aras 2 ke aras -4...fuhhh..balik tu..menapak ler..ikot jln parking...so xde tangga...tp berbukit la pulak...haih..mcm jungle trekking pulak...sudahnye..isnin...saket lah betis sy yg cantik ni...huhu...xpuas2 shopping la katakan...mula2 pusing carboot..rs xde bende nk bli...last2..bli jugak...penuh stroller aqil jd troller bwk brg...byk brg baby la pulak..rs kesian kt aqil pulak...ntah...sejak nk dpt anak no2 ni..hari2 duk estimate camna nk bahagi kasih kelak..hrp2...sy xmenganakitrikn Aqil bila dpt baby baru nnt...risau jugak...biasa...anak sulung selalu diketepikn setelah dpt adik baru....tp sbb Aqil comel pd mata sy...sy mmg xsampai hati nk kecewakn dia walaupon kdg2 terpaksa...kdg2 termrh jugak...biasalh..hidup ni mana ada yg sempurna.....

Rezeki 1 Ramadhan....:)

Alhamdulillah..alhamdulillah...Ramadhan dtg lagi..seronok teramat...xtahu nape tiap kali Ramadhan..rs jiwa ni tenang dan aman..xmcm bulan2 yg lain.keje nk marah dan berangin ajer...seronok Ramadhan ni...sbb nnt bertemu dgn buka puasa...wahhh...mcm2 yg diplan utk dimasak...jadi utk itu..kenelah bersahur sbb kt edinburgh ni puasa 17 jam..haa...dr 3.30 pagi..sampai lah..8.30 mlm...gitulah cthnya...jd utk org yg mengandung, menyusukan anak mmg lah tersgt mencabar..jd bersahur lah utk survive lg 17 jam tu..

Sahur cam biasa, lauk biasa2 ajer..ayam msk tomato..lidah org mengandung ni serba xkena ajer..mujur suami mkn..mula igt nk bli kt kwn..tp insist gak nk masak..tibe2 jadi terajin lak masak...apesal pon xtahu..bdn pon agak bertenaga, jadi..masuklah ke dapur...juga niat nk abeskn stok2 dapur tu...lg 10 hari kan nk balik for good...wahhh...xsabar rasenye...kt Kl pon xmasak beriye camni...

Pagi2, kesian suami, kene bgn awal...anak tido lewat...ntah ape kene...asyik keje nk tgk BOB THE BUILDER ajer kt youtube...dithn2 nyer mata xmau tido...nk suh tido pon susah....cemtulah ade anak kecik...ade jer kerenah..tp ttp menghuburkan dan menyejukkn mata memandang...kdg mrh jugak tambah2 bila bdn saket dn leteh....menyesal rsnya..tp kalau diikut segala..takut naik kepala pulak..so...biar la die belajar sedikit erti kecewa walaupon sy sendiri sedar..kecewa tu amat memedihkn..

Oh, suami bgn pagi sbb ke carboot...ehehe..minggu ni minggu terakhir dpt ke carboot..kt KL, adeke carboot yg mmg tersgt lah murah nyer...mainan2...sy convertkan yer...cth spt brand fisher price shape sorter, baru dlm RM3...sekenhen...nk beli baru...hmmm harga kt sini...dalam 15 pound...darab lah sendiri...org2 kt sini pon ramai ke carboot...dan kalau tgk rumah2 org melayu kt sini..anak2 mmg dilimpahi toys yg teramatlah byknye..buleh dikatakan..tiap2 minggu...pasti ade je buah tgn dr parents masing2...seronok kn??? Tuhlah sy berkias2 dgn suami..dtglah keje kt sini...seronok anak2 dpt mainan baru tiap minggu...expenses xbyk...pakai buang pon buleh...tos2 yg dijual..sumer branded2...tp dh bp thn tu...xtahu lah..dan mmg masih elok2..yg menarik omputih ni..diorg xkn jual sesuatu yg xlengkap...tp kalau toys tu..mestilah ade part2 yg dh hilang2 kan..so tu mmg jual murah...jual lelong org ckp...toys rege RM1.50 pon leh dpt....hihihi...

Biasa sumai yg g carboot sbb sy kalau g,mesti jln siket dh rs nk pitam..penat...smlm pegi la jugak kejap..xreti sgt tawar menawar selalu no luck..so sy suh suami g awal2 pagi..ms baru2 buka...alhamdulillah..seronok sgt...smlm dpt ape yg dihajati selama ni...dh byk kali attempt nk bli benda alah tu...selalu termiss..dah book..tp seller jual kt org pulak...xde rezeki..rupenya Allah nk kasi rezeki yg lebih baik sbg pembuka Ramadhan...alhamdulillah...ape bende tu...haha...biasalah org pompuan...suke survey kan...so nk menambahkn equipment baby...(dlm plan nk ade anak byk lagi nih)..beli siap2 keperluan yg buleh pakai sampai ke anak bongsu...equipment yg konon nk bli dulu ms anak pertama yg xdibeli2 sbb mhl....ade lg 1...tp dah terasa kurang keperluan..jadi xbeli pon walau pon offer yg sgt menarik...

Puasa pulak..alhamdulillah..hari pertama seronok...kurang penat..rsnye penat lg ms menyusukn bdn dulu..dh petang...nk balik keje tu..aduhh..leteh teramat....mmg sah2 lah lauk bli jer kt pasar ramadan...kt sini..kenelah masak...byk pulak..sampai penuh perut....hari ni...berbuka...igt nk menjala...leh mkn dgn kari ayam smlm....:)

Last bits to MSc PE...

There is less than 2 weeks i will be completing my course. As long as i can recalled, the past few months, were the hectic months for me as a student cum mother cum wife. It was really a challenging time that i went through from September 2008 until now. If i was given a choice, I would rather stay and work than came here for MSc. I guess, it would be rather a bit easy if you really get fully support from your family but not me. I think the courage that I had to complete this course came from my innerself. It was very hard to dig it out. As before, while doing degree, I got fully support from a person that I owed so much. I came from a non-educated family however, I know, my parents always pray for my success eventhough they don't know how to give moral support in words. My siblings..nahh...they always challenged me and we hardly say good luck to each other..and i feel, my journey in reaching my own goals..are all by myself...i really wish that i get a complete support from everyone..i feel grateful that i know friends that easily wish me luck in whatever i do, and that is why, i always remember my friends but my weakness is, i don't know how to show them that i really appreciate them all...

Almost a year I forget everything i left at home but deep in my heart..i kept remember how my house is..hehe...yeah..at 25 years old, I already owned a property by myself. Then, the property become a place for us to live. But, I have this weakness, i'm easily get worried of anything and evrything, that brought me to get married earlier as i need emotional support from the other half. What we planned, we seldom get..that is what I am experiencing now.I am still full of worries and it get worsen. However, thanked to Allah who is always there and hear me cry during my prayers and i feel relief. The ups and down that i went through taught me to be strong for the future and this is the value added that i've always overlooked. What i think is i want an easy life, with no stress at all..but how can that be?

I think, I do not favor doing research work. I hate it. I am very relief now as I've finished the report eventhough the report is a bit rubbish but the idea is there. I really hope the examiners will accept it and give me the pass mark, that is all i aimed for. Due to my current condition, i can't hope so high as the constraint is very much hard to overcome. It's lucky that I am still doing it rather than forget about it. It's only 20%.One of my friend even request to resit a paper to get a good grade but the advisor says no. I am really think that, the university is happy enough to pass all of the student. Hopefully.

Now, the last bits are to submit the report, presentation, SPE and then HOME!!! Wish me luck for these last bits....

Xpuas Shopping....

I lurve shopping so much...tp bukan yg expensive ones...yg murah2 jer tapi branded...haaa..camna tuuu....i wish i can bu all those expensive stuff once i stepped in the outlet but i can't..it's just not me!..I like to look around, do price surveying and compare...which is cheaper...and then..i convert into RM..haha...ridiculous yeah? Some people told me not to convert prices here to RM but i do...because if i can get the same thing at home..why shud i buy it??..make my boxes full...haha..and things i love here is when sale is coming..it is really sale..and the best thing is..i can shop online...and sometimes...free delivery...amazing yeah???...am also love to browse through on shelf in the store..and there was once i bought a mini remote control car that RRP 30 pound and i paid just less than 3 pound..baloi kan????

And yesterday, after my hubby;s meeting with his supervisor...we went out to pick up my shoes at Clarks'..sale OK...xde nyer nk bli RRP price..never pon...only buy when it is on sale!..but poor hubby, his order did not fit his feet...kaki lebar...kasut tu slim...kehkehkeh..mine...pon lebar..but i know...now my kaki dah mengembang...lg pon kasut tu hanya buleh dipakai for functions only...hihihi....then...masuk GAP...wahhh..ade stock clearance...jalan2...belek...penat dah sebenarnye....haha..amik 1 jeans...GAP KIDS...kihkih...muat tu...owhh...pasni..baik bli baju budak..really fits me well...owhh...I feel like I'm very young....kihkihkih...

Then, we off to Curry's..nk tgk if kot2..my steamer still on shelf tak...pusing2...owhh..they are still having massive clearance and many of appliances have been reduced to a very2 cheap price....mata dah terbeliak...cari punya carik..yeay!!..there it was....weeee...tapi....steamer tu...yg display...i dun care...sbb the price was so cheap..in fact direduced kn lagi....yeay..i got the one that i wanted....tp ade 1 part missing..anyway...does not matter...xeffect the function...tp baloi....seronok gile...snang nk simpan..fuhh...belum try lagi....nampak gak food processor...tp rs mesti yg display gak..tp menarik wooo...ade liquidiser....haha...nnt lahh....xmemerlukan sgt...lg memerlukan steamer...yeah...dpt steamer letric...alhamdulillah....masih ade rezeki utk ku....dan dgn ini bermakna...bertambah lagi brg2 nk dibwk balik...muat ke tidak kontena nih....hmmm???

Hari-Hari di Bumi Scotland...

Lagi 2 weeks jer..kontena akan sampai dan segala brg2 yg akan ditemui dlm sebulan 2 akan dipindah masuk..maka kosonglah bilik tetamu ku...skang, sgtlah penuh, itupun baru 3/4 belum termasuk brg2 yg masih belum dicapai..byk lagi dlm wishlist...ade rezeki adelah...xdpt..mungkin rezeki yg lebih menanti kt tanah air sendiri...kt sini yg seronok tiap2 minggu ade carboot...tp sygnyer...ms nk akhir2 ni..baru lah terbuka minda ttg ape yg nk dicari dicarboot..kalau dulu..setakat pergi cuci mata dan asyik membeli buku2 utk Aqil...semenjak pregnant no.2 ni..barulah terbukak mata nk cari brg2 baby yg mana xdpt ms pregnant kn Aqil dulu...fuhh..byk lagi...kelengkapan2 yg belum dicapai...jugak brg2 electronics...kitchen appliances..dan jugak pingganmangkuk...ish...sempat ke ni nk p jengah...dgn kesibukan menyiapkn dissertation..sibukkah?? mcm tak jer...kesihatan yg on and off menyebbkn fokus utk membuat report sgtlah low...dr rating 1 hingga 10..mungkin energy level ku hanya 1...owh..igt nk extend..tp boleh kah??cuma 20% shj...hmmm....pasti kene kuar duit sendiri....serius..pengalaman belajar kali ni xseindah digambarkn...indah lagi kenangan blajar zaman solo....:)

11 sept 2008, aku mendarat di bumi UK buat pertama kali...rakan2 yg jugak baru pertama kali bertemu dan berkenalan yg menyambut penuh mesra ditgh bulan puasa..ditumpangkn di rumah kenalan yg jugak baru pertama kali diperkenalkn..di sini aku belajar hidup bermasyarakat...kt KL...hmm...masuk rumah..tutup pintu..mmg xde aktiviti lgsg dgn kawan2..bosan...disini masa2 yg paling aku suka bila ade gathering..wahhh...seronok berkumpul, berborak dan makann..makan yg paling aku suka...sbb itu mmg hobi aku..suka makan...kihkih...aku hrp, slps pulang nnt, aktiviti2 ni masih berterusan...inshaAllah....akan ku alu2kn rakan2 menjengah ke teratak buruk ku yg tinggi di atas langit...yerlah...aku xberumah di atas tnh...aku berumah kt ruang udara...nampak gaya..aku kene kemas cpt2 rumah utk menyambut tetamu pd bila2 masa...owh...tak sabar nk make over rumah...mujur balik awal...tp larat kah??? dgn perut makin membsar...hmm..kali ni cpt pulak membesar...aku rs..saiz perut skang spt saiz perut ku 8 bulan ms pregnant kali pertama....fuhh..agaknya hasil lebihan lelemak yg dahulu kot...huhuh...

31 Ogos 2009...belum genap 365 hari aku dibumi Uk, aku terpaksa pulang dgn hati yg berat meninggalkn semua warga edinburgh yg mungkin tidak akan dilupakn sampai bila2...disini..diibarat sebuah keluarga yg besar...seronok...dan aku berhrp...silaturrahim yg terjalin ini berkekalan sampai bila2 walau tanpa pertalian drh..kita sesama muslim kan bersaudara...:)...31 ogos jugak detik kemerdekaan Tanah Melayu yg kini dikenali sbg Malaysia jadi mmg pd tarikh itu aku sptutnya merdeka dr Msc ku..dan aku berhrp ia menjadi benar...Amin..doakan aku...1 sep 2009, mendaratlah aku nnt...dpt berbuka puasa di tnh air sendiri...tp dlm hati ttp risau..kenapa??..ape lagi kalau bukan H1N1 yg berleluasa tanpa kawalan di tnh air sendiri...aku hrp aku tidak lupa membeli mask seblum naik flight...aku risau...sbb aku dan Aqil merupakan org2 yg berisiko tinggi...Ya Allah, lindungilah kami berdua...sbb tu aku terasa amat berat nk pulang...takutkn kene menetap di hospital..sapa g nak jaga aku...sapa nk jaga Aqil....hmmm..mintak2 dijauhkan...

Raya nnt ntahlah cemane...cuti aku xbyk..aku ni mesti byk nk bercerita dgn keluarga...dptkah kali ni beraya lama siket dgn mak, abah, kakak, abang2 dan anak2 buah yg pasti merindui aku..(konpem nk duit raya byk2 ler tu...nasib baiklah korang jer 3 org anak buah sejati..boleh la cik kasi duit raya byk...duit raya pound sterling nak???)..oh..terlupa pulak souvenir2 utk 2 anak teruna tu....yg si gadis...dh beli..suka xsuka...terima la ekk.tp coklat pasti menunggu korang....hihihi...aku jenis yg jrg talipon keluarga sbb keluarga aku pon jenis jrg talipon2 ni...biasa kalau berjumpa..ha..boraklah masa tu...masing2 pon mmg kenal perangai masing2...xde bende mustahak...mmg xde lah talipon..tp doa sentiasa dlm iringan....cemtulah ingatan buat keluarga...kdg2 somethings are better left unsaid kan...

Memenuhi TAG dr Liza....

TAG buleh buat...THESIS...malas...hahaha....

WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN YOUR LIFE?
happiness...:)

WHAT IS THE LAST THING THAT YOU BOUGHT WITH YOUR OWN MONEY?
owh...tadi ada beli croissant, donut dgn minyak masak...hehehe...

WHERE DO YOU WISH TO GET MARRIED?
kat space...hihi..pelamin nyer bintang2...ceyyy...

HOW OLD DO YOU THINK YOU WILL BE PERMANENTLY OWNED BY UR LOVE?
ntah...hingga hujung nyawa....bertemu di syurga...

ARE YOU IN LOVE?
of course~~

WHERE WAS THE LAST RESTAURANT YOU HAD DINNER?
hmmm....dinner??..xpnah dinner kt luar...tp rsnyer...lunch+dinner pnah la kot..kt malaysian hall kitchen, london....

NAME THE LATEST BOOK THAT YOU BOUGHT?
book??..beli tp xbaca....so..mmg xigt tajuk..

WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
Joely - ala2 angelina jolie (perghh...perasan~~)

DO YOU PREFER YOUR MOTHER OR FATHER?
mmm....dua-dua laaaa.....

NAME A PERSON THAT YOU REALLY WISH TO MET IN REAL LIFE FOR THE FIRST TIME?
nk jumpe sape...xtahulahhh.....bumblebee boleh x???

CHRISTINA OR BRITNEY?
dah xminat 2-2.....

DO YOU DO YOUR OWN LAUNDRY?
takk....my super hubby buat....

THE MOST EXCITING PLACE YOU WANT TO GO?
disneyland...florida.....

CAMERA OR MP3 OR HP?
HP yg ade camera dan mp3 player...:)

POINT OUT 5 THINGS ABOUT THE PERSON WHO TAGGED YOU
1. rakan seperjuangan membuyung...hihihi...
2. wife kpd ex-skulmate dan ipar kpd ex-coursemate...
3. her skin is realllyy fair..jeles iii....
4. very the petite and always have the happy faces..:)
5. rajin dok ajak mai umah dia kt german tu haa....:)

3 THINGS I SAY TOO OFTEN?
1. Aqil~~
2. No!
3. Well done!

BOOK I'VE RECENTLY?
xmembaca pon...xde mood...tp adelah baca buku anak...buku thomas...hihihi

4 SONGS I COULD LISTEN TO OVER AND OVER AGAIN?
1. Baby Go - The noissete...yeke??
2. Bob the Builder
3. Poker Face - Lady Gaga
4. Fifi and the flowertots

3 THINGS I LEARNED LAST YEAR?
1. Sabar
2. Redha
3. Tawakal

Hrp maaf...saya tgh mood malas mengetag pslnye..xramai pon org dlm blog list saya ni....okeh liza....dah buat tag kamu....:)

Kuih-kuih...

Heee..sbb hari ni dpt mengupload gambo ke dlm blog nieh...jadi mari kita lihat kuih2 saya...haha..nk kembang semangkuk lah ni...psl ape nk kembang semangkuk??..sbb nyer...sy yg PEMALAS benor masuk ke dapur sejak menjak pregnant ni...berhasil jugak membuat beberapa jenis kuih..beberapa kah???..xsemua sempat di snap gambo2...hehe...tp saje nk tunjuk kuih2 sy...cantikkk takkk????...poyo kan???..


Ni muffin saya...rasenya before pregnant buat nih....ntahler...xigt...buat ms hubby nk pi amik kete....buat bekal die dan kwn2...Serupa kilang muffin dah...Sian Aqil xley mkn nih..ade susu dan coklat....die pon faham die xley mkn susu dan coklat....


Nih pulak donut yg hubby dok suh buat...jap jer habes mknnyer...Aqil suka giler...buat 2 round berturut-turut..psl esok nyer die mintak lagii...nk menguli nyer..mak aih...mujur xlenguh tgn...breadmaker xterbeli2 lg...jgn lupa udah...hihihi....


Ni karipap saya...suka2...hihihi...skang dh expert sket mengelim..kalau dulu2..sure huduh jer kelim nyer...hihihi...buat quite a few time..yg nih rsnyer inti sardin...hihihi...Aqil mkn kelim jer...isi xmo mkn...

The two bridge...

I feel very happy to write on today..so I separated today's activities into 2 posts.After we done with strawberries picking, we went down to forth bridge and another bridge which i dunno what the name is. Forth bridge is just like a lego creation..hehe...it is for the train rails...not for cars...the other bridge is for cars..There were so many people there...as I said, the weather today is really good for outing. There was a bot cruising too but we did not ride on it because we only be there for photography..chewah..I never thought that there's lot of thing in Edinburgh that are scenic and tourist attractions....yerlah...asyik masuk kelas...kuar kelas dh ptg....pehtu winter dok umah saja....xkuar psl sejuk menggigit tulang....then..masuk kelas balik....pehtu bersambung group project pulak..then bershopping online pulak..so..last..terperuk lah dirumah ajer...haha...


At the right..bridge for cars..At the left is the forth bridge..

I love to see the sea..I dunno why...the sea, the scenery...really make me enjoy my day...i love to take picture of the naturals...i dunno why..but I'm not into photography..I know..if you are really fond to it..you could have spend lots of money for it...but for me...I love to see with my own eyes..take picture..just for myself...i have a lots...but not printed...maklumlah..skang ni gune digicamm.... I could see the seabirds...i could see the boats..the cars...the train passing through the bridge...and my son keep calling the train.."Oh..there's Thomas..there's Thomas"


This is the boat ride that we did not explore...

When I point to the sea..he would say..."I want to go the water"..and he tried to climb up the fence...OMG...And when he saw the seabirds...he called them "look...ducks.."...When he saw the helicopter up in the sky...He would scream..."Heli-Op-ter.."....When he saw aeroplane..he would scream " Ae-lo-plane"..he just can say the "R" correcty....when i taught him to do..rrrrrrrr..he will keep silent and smile...hahah...kene ajar sebut R ni...adeh....my in law family..they can't even say "nombor" corretly...they say..."nombol"..hahaha.....


Tired Aqil....hehehe..

PYO Strawberries....Yummy!!!

This morning, my family and i were invited to join my former lecturer's trip to strawberry farm just not far from our house. I was so excited to join...I love going out with family friends so i can have adult conversation or watch the kids play together...So then, we departed from our house around half past 11 and arrived aroudn 15 minutes later...I thought it was really far as my hubby said the farm is near to the forth bridge...and the weather today is really good...no rain...so it is really enjoyable to spend the day out...


Strawberry secret hideout...:)

The farm name is Craigie's Farm..it has lots of berries...such as gooseberries, raspberries, strawberries, blueberries, redcurrants and also vegetables...and they are all organic...I think so!!...heheh..there's also a cafe for drinks and breads...also ice-cream....there's also tractor-like toys for children to play with..but we did not have time to try on since there was a lot of people at the farm today...


Aqil picking up his gooseberry....see the basket...all the strawberries had gone into his mouth...

We then picked up our basket, a big one and a small one for our little boy to pick up for himself. We were really enjoying the sunshine although there were not much of strawberries left...I think because it's already near end of season...however, we were still managed to pick some sweet and crunchy strawberries...We just went straight to the strawberries without testing the taste of other berries because I only loves strawberries, so does my son...while picking, he was eating..and for the first few strawberries...all gone into his mouth...so i was wondering how good the taste is..then, i have a try on myself...subhanallah...it was really sweet which u can't taste it when you buy one at the store...the taste and crunchyness you can taste it fresh!!! Even the color was not so red...it was still sweet...only few...i think ones which near to best before date that I wrongly picked, taste a bit sour...


Aqil was looking for his strawberry..

At the end, I was tired since I need to bend down to search for strawberries, I surrender when my son had his poopoo..lucky that i brought his nappy along...so we got changed and rest a while in the car. While in the car, i screen again the strawberries that we picked, only the best will be weighted and paid..hehe..the rest...will be put into our mouth...eheh...and we gained 875 grams of strawberries today...most of them were small and i think..if i spend the whole day there...i could have brought back the big ones...ehehe..and now...all the strawberries had been eaten by our little strawberries monster...only left a few that i saved for myself...hahaha...i think..all the harvest will finish by today...:)

New Policy lagiii...

Saya ni baru keje dgn kompeni P xsampai 5 thn..tp punyalah mcm2 perubahan management buat..seblum tu rsnya aman ja pekerja2 kompeni2 P ni..perubahan tang gaji tu OK jugak...buleh diterima sbbnya..mmg tangga gaji kompeni P yg kunun bertaraf antarabangsa mmg xsetara dgn kompeni2 seangkatannya di negara2 lain even negara yg politiknya asyik berkocak...haha..ramai rakan2 igt..kerja dgn kompeni P, dpt gaji besar, saya mmg cukup emo dgn anggapan ini..lainlah kalau gaji saya 5 angka tiap bulan..ya..mmg cukup besar tu...nk mkn kt starbuck bekfas hari2 pon buleh..xdak hal....

Berbalik pd perubahan policy terbaru yg dgr khabar nya staff xley kawen sama2 staff..uiks?? Hendak mencabar hukum alam kah??Kemudian ada pulak yg ckp, utk existing staff akan dioffer VSS pulak...haih..mcm2..apa yg sy doakan..biarlah usul2 ni xmenjadi dan biarlah sediakala..kenapa ini berlaku..sy pasti semua kerana desakan org2 luar yg sentiasa tidak berpuas hati dgn kebahagiaan staff2 di kompeni P.Inilah masyarakat kita, pantang tgk org lain lebih, mesti nk cucuk2..Alih, utk menjaga hati org luar, maka timbullah perubahan2 yg tidak enak kpd staff2 kompeni P...terbaru, sampaikan bonus kompeni P jatuh kurang berbanding thn2 terdahulu walaupon keuntungan berlipat kali ganda berlebih dr thn2 terdahulu..kenapa??..Pasti ada org2 luar yg komplen..kononnya staff2 kompeni P dpt bonus byk tiap tahun..Tp sy heran..kenapa meraka asyik xpuas hati..haih..sy mmg emo bab ni..walau keja saya taklah sampai dimaterialisekn kpd duit..tp keja2 kwn2 sy yg berhempas pulas mencari keuntungan syarikat, tentu lebih terasa drpd sy....keja kwn2 sy yg mn tiap2 kali buku akaun hendak ditutup...pasti lebih terasa drpd sy...masyarakat di luar..masih tidak memahami kenape staff2 kompeni wajar diberi keistimewaan itu...pd sy...jika...jika...kompeni P gagal beroperasi dgn baik...tiadalah MALAYSIA pd hari ini..tiadalah KLCC pd hari ini..jadi...masyarakat perlu sedar kehadiran kompeni P yg telah menaikkn martabat Negara..jadi apalah slhnya kompeni P timang2 staff2 yg telah pulun utk menjaga nama negara ini???? Hish..emo ni...

Pertukaran management pon menjadi titik perubahan terhdp policy2 dlm kompeni P..konon nk lebih outstanding..tp sy heran dgn sikap manusia yg tidak habes2 hendak mengejar nama spy dimarked..oh..inilah perubahan yg telah dilakukn..spjg ini, perubahan yg sy buleh terima ialah kenaikan gaji pd kali pertama dahulu...lain2..sumer nyer terpaksa ikot..nak tak nak..perkara itu ttp akan dilaksanakan...lagipon keja sy tidaklah seberapa berat..mungkin jika kerja sy dh berat kelak...sy akan lebih terasa...apabila dibandingkn dgn mereka2 yg bekerja di opis lain yg menerima gaji lumayan dr sy...tp sy anggap itu rezeki mereka...sy sudah sgt bersyukur sewaktu diterima masuk kompeni P..sy suka benefit2 nya..dan skang sy mulai risau benefit2 itu ditarik balik atas sbb nk jg hati org luar...top2 management yg baik2 dan berakal..kebyknnya nk pencen..tinggal org2 baru yg eager nk buat perubahan..mungkin ada kepentingan tertentu tanpa memikirkn org bwhn....ntahlah...yg menajdi mangsa..eksekutif yg tidak berpersatuan....terpaksalah terima segalanya...redha xredha..situlah periuk nasi...dahla skang ni ekonomi xmenentu...dgn cerita VSS...bila agaknya sy dpt berumah diatas tnh..ptg2 buleh bercucuk tnm kt laman rumah yer....hmmm.....angan...oh..angan.....

A tiring vacation...serik deh....

Last weekend we went to London, Mr Hubby's arrangement. But it was a really tiring experience and I hope I will asked no more for this while pregnant. I was not enjoying my self at all but what I get is all a tiring experience. I've been imagining this but I still proceed with the plan just to "jaga hati" my hubby as I've always asked to go to London to see how is it looks like and guess what, I don't think I like London. Yeah, London must be a shopping heaven for some people but not me. I am not a luxurious shopaholic so I don't see the attractiveness of London. Ha Ha..Guess what, all the big2 boutiques along the Oxford Street are having sales and I don't even eager to have a look because my tiring feet was killing me badly..I had to carry 12 kg todd whenever he got cranky and I know..He's also didn't like London..Always asked to get home from the very first day...Lucky we don't study in London but in Edinburgh where we really got a peaceful life.

London is just like KL, that is why I don't like it. I like a peaceful place..like kampung lahh...because I know, in a Metropolitan city like London, people are rude and the crime rate is high. My hubby was really worry as I was carrying handbag and I said there's nothing in it..just Quran...my walllet always in pocket and so my hp..It was just because my handbag is not a zipped ones. Yeah, while strolling around London, we don't feel so secured as we strolled around edinburgh. We travelled a lot by Tube and there i found the London's people just the same as KL people...which I really don't like..even they are said to be very civilised but i think, London is full with foreigners and people from outside. They don;t even care to give a seat to a pregnant lady or a father who holding a kid...and they even looked up...what the ****???? I was really shocked to see London's people atttitude...and at the tube station, during rush hour...just the same as at our LRT station...OMG..i feel like I was in KL...surrounded by people who walked really fast and just bumped you without saying sorry.....

The streets were always full of cars and buses...I dd not see any tram though..I think it is at farther zone.And the tube ticket is really expensive...so does the bus ticket...Glad I am in Edinburgh...I think...Scotts are more decent and polite though.....The buses are not stroller friendly as in edinburgh...the steps are quite high...I can see that...also the tube station are not all steps free...that is why we stopped using stroller on the second day as pity my hubby need to carry the stroller up n down the stairs..and I have to carry the todd....that is why I said..it was really a tiring trip....

However, despite the bad things or unforgiven things happened in London., we managed to get to Malaysian Hall and have Malaysian food everyday...haha..yummy yeahh...lucky my baby in the tummy still there as i was really worried because I was damned tired during the end of the day...which I know, baby will also experiencing the same thing..we also get to capture some picture on the attractive sites of London..couldn't post it here..maybe somewhen next time..We went around London by tour bus which is not stroller friendly at all...remember this...huhu...and the bus is damned really fast...just like you were on the city bus...huhu....it was really different when we ride on tour bus in Vienna...the bus went slow so the tourist can see the whole city clearly and take pictures....I like Vienna...very peaceful...but they don't speak english of course...hahaha....and difficult to find Halal food...not like London..it is really easy to find Halal food...but i did not get to Halal KFC or Nandos...as I'm on saving mode....hihi...

If you plan to go to London for vacation..please consider these few things I listed below:

1. Don't go if you're pregnant more than 4 months and with toddlers. Toddler gets cranky easily when they are tired or get too excited...Sian my Aqil..sampai lebam2 kene cubit dgn papa...but I cannot do anything as I was really damned tired to handle all by myself...

2. London streets are busy during weekdays..Less busy during weekend..I would suggest, go on weekend for strolling but if you want to shop...I think..best is Saturday...please don't bring children with you while shopping...xdapek nyer nk shopping babe....

3. Plan where you are going to stay...I would suggest for you all to stay nearby Malaysian Hall..snang nk mkn...hehe...there's a few travelodge there....I stayed in Premier Inn..ok la..nearby the train station..so xyah nk travel2 to get to the train station kan...snang...book as early as possible...so you can get the cheapest rate in town...hihi....oh ya..Malaysia Hall is located nearby to Bayswater Tube station or to be specific...in Queensborough Terrace...

4. If you bwk kids..better to go for kids attraction places rather than historical places...mcm Big Ben, Tower Bridge..this is a lesson learnt to me...don't plan to a place that u want to...but think of the kids...if you want to bring them along...:)..kalau x...haru biru lah vacation itu....penat je dpt...budak nanges ajer..sian kt budak....

5. Plan your trip..jgn main terjah ajer...like mine...main terjah..so jd penat...and I think..I will not be going anywhere dah after this...sbb dh sgt serik...plus My Hubby cam terpaksa jer bwk...sbb I insisted so long nk jln2...but then, he brought me at the wrong time...because I was in no mood of travelling....and I am in 20 weeks of pregnancy...my tummy is already big though....

6. Make sure yourselves are really fit if you bring kids..kalau budak kecik less than 3 years...kdg mintak dukung...so make sure you are really strong to do so...and please...jgn merungut...lg penat kalau merungut...and..yeah..pity the kids...use your psychology to treat the kids OK...I've almost cry when seeing my son cry sbb kene cubit...then my heart sobbed when seeing the bruises he had....so don't allowed your hubby to punish the kids as they have no heart....(mrh nih....tp ape nk buat...bende dh jadik kn...mmg dh tahu kalau ayah yg punis..mesti berbekas....)

I am still tired...my body ached badly...I hope the sore will gone in a quick time as I need to finish my homework...only a month to go..oh...so quick...cepat2...wat report....huhu...

Planning for Aqil's 3rd Birthday!!!

Tak pernah celebrate birthday Aqil buat jamuan kt rumah..jamu kwn2 dan saudara mara yg dkt2 dgn rumah. Sendiri pon pnah dpt only once jer birthday party kt rumah...hihi..tu pon kecil-kecilan ajer..jemput kwn2 sepermainan jer...dgn jiran2 seblah menyebelah...Igt kali ni...nk buat jugak utk Aqil..so die akan rs occupied with budak2 sebaya dgn dia...dan mama dia boleh lah beramah mesra dgn kwn2 mama....tp...di mn yg sesuai nk diadakn yer??...dulu kecik2..pnahlah makcik2 yg tinggal kt KL (ms tu baru 6 thn kot) bwk g Macdonald celebrate bday...Best sgt...dpt mcm2 toys...tp skang Mcdonald kasi toys kecik2 jer..dulu2..besar2....huhuhu....siyap dpt coloring book lagi...best3...so...pergi Macdonald..hanya apabila kaki menjengah KL...psl diorg stay kt bangsar....slalu pergi Macdonald yg kt bangsar tu lah...sampai skang masih wujud lg Macdonald tu....

OK, back to Aqil's birthday plan...since birthday die jatuh hari isnin...rs2 wajar buat weekend seblum ke??? selepas yer??? Aper list yg kene sedia utk wat jamuan mkn2 tu yer???...and waktu ape yg sesuai??? Sbb xpnah ade pengalaman kan....Menu dia....hmmm..birthday cake nampak gaya kene special booking sbb die xley gune butter or milk...pehtu....as he wish...die cake ade muka THOMAS....ade ke kedai kek yg pandai buat kek cemtu...igt nk wat sendiri...tp mamanyer ni..mana lah reti deco2....huhuhu....

Mama, Aqil nak cake cenggini...hihihi....

Then...rumah dok kondo...kecik jer rumah...muat ke kalau jemput org ramai2..huhuh...nk jemput siapa pon xtahu lg...kalau buat kt kolam renang bwh tu...kene jemput 2 blok kondo tu pulak...hihihi...sekali lah...birthday Aqil tu dgn housewarming..xpnah buat lg...psl br jer pindah...dah dtg UK pulak..brg2 pon byk dlm kotak lg...tp rasenyer...bulan 10 tu pon..brg2 byk dlm kotak lg...or..brg2 dr UK yg diship tu pon...rase2nyer...xsampai2 lagi....huhuhu....kwn2 sudi ke dtg ker teratak buruk saya nih??????

The result....

I just went to scan this afternoon.It was an anomaly scan and was done for about more than half an hour. The radiographer was really kind and she explained everything she saw to me and i just like, wow, feeling like I'm having a first class treatment. She scanned everything and when she could not get good picture of my baby, she asked me to empty the bladder and waited me outside so that I won't enter the wrong room because there were so many many rooms and I was second time being there. I really like the atmosphere, very friendly and you'll feel it is worth waiting before you got your scan. And I was really satisfied with the scanning processes which I learned a lot today about my baby. Now i list what i can see - anyway this is the normal scanning not 3 D:

1. I saw the baby yawning - sleepy yeh?? it was afternoon anyway...time for nap...hehe
2. I saw the lip - i think the baby got mine..hihi...I don't know...but it is as beautiful as the brother though...
3. I can see the legs - crossed legs ok...hehe..bersila ke???
4. I can see the feet with all the fingers...alhamdulillah..all looks fine..
5. I can see the hands - sempat lagi hi-5 mama yer baby!!!
6. I can see the heart beating and my guts said the beats were gentle and I think the baby was at calm mode..xmcm abg..laju giler dgr heartbeat dia...huhu...asyik melompat jer...hihi..
7. I saw the baby putting the hand into mouth...
8. I saw the nose - looks like mine ajer....got batang hidung...
9. I saw the spine...looks fine...
10. I saw the kidneys...and they are fine....
11. The brain development - she measured the cereblum, medula...and all are fine..

Alhamdulillah...the baby is in a good position - liquor OK, placenta OK and the age is 20 weeks and 4 days...EDD still on 27th Nov 2009...hope the baby goes out earlier than that...mama want to get dressed in university robe and grabbed my Msc...ehehe...

Only that...............................

I feel frustrated.......................

Maybe I put too much hope...............

Maybe I wasn't pray so hard.............

Maybe my life was really sinful in Edinburgh...........

I will get another hero.................my fear....my big fear has come again......

Then.......I blames Mr Hubby...of course....huhu...nobody to be blamed though...just him or me....I tried my best...and still a boy....I wish for a girl...and still the feeling to have a girl still there....kempunan nk beli baju pink....kempunan sgt...

But....I do love the baby...I'll do the same as I took care your bro....I'll never make any difference of my love to you...it's just I have the fear...that...there will be no girls in our family...it just that....it just that....really....because my sister got girl for her second...and also hub's cousin...and my side...if 2nd boy...then...it become all boys in the family....And the fear also came...what will be the family sayings...specially from Mr Hubby's side...specially my MIL....she was hoping for girl too...my mom...oh dear...will she has time to have another granddaughter???....Pity to my niece...xde gegirl cousin....all boys....oh..dear...and it's gonna be another 'anak mama' which the greatest fear....as I will never have a good time for myself...Mr Hubby will treat the same as the first one....this truly a challenge to me....I need helper but i don't want 'alien' in the house...Aqil is still small to help me....But he must be really happy got a company to share his toys....Thomas and Bob freak!! :) Anyway...I still happy...I got 2 bodyguards....and easy for me to plan the room...they can instantly share the room...I plan to decorate their room with blue theme...everything blue....

"Ya Allah...berilah kekuatan untukku menerima kenyataan ini..jauhi lah aku drpd kufur akan nikmat-Mu...Ya Allah...berilah aku keyakinan dlm mendidik anak2 ku menjadi anak yg soleh semoga dpt menyelamatkn ku dr siksa api neraka-Mu....Ya Allah...celikkn mata dan hatiku agar aku dpt melihat dgn jelas hikmah di sebalik setiap pemberian-Mu...Amin...."

2nd pregnancy experience...

The first one was unexpected and unplanned but everything went OK only a few months of morning sickness which happened usually in the evening and at home. However, I was still energetic to do stuffs eventhough I was having morning sickness.

The second one is quite different though. This time was a planned pregnancy and Alhamdulillah, Allah granted our prayers.:) However, the challenges are so big that there's sometimes I felt unbearable. With coming to 3 y.o boy around me really makes me sick everyday. He is so brilliant with tricks and stuffs and always cling with me whenever he is at home. Also he's started to make some cues to gain attention from me regardless whether I'm sick or tired or hungry. He cries a lot nowadays and I was really at my uppermost temper. Since I don't want to be cruel to him, I just let him cry and i kept silent just to wash away my anger. But, sometimes, I do gently 'pukul' him or pinch him whenever I have to repeat the same instruction again and again - cannot 'sabar' anymore..huhu..I was wrong when i thought getting pregnant when the first child is already grown up will be easier but it is tougher i think..

Yeah, this second pregnancy, although i did not vomit a lot like last time but my nausea was still as bad as last time. Furthermore, I can't hold to do housework frequently as everytime i do it, my body will turn into blue, i guess. I never explore why I always be like this but it was really terrifying everytime I'm almost turn to black out. This always happened after i just about to finish doing the cooking. I will feel very cold, my feet, hands were all cold, my body just felt restless more a like want to fall down and i becoming breathless. I quickly sat down or lie down a few minutes until the feeling fade away.First I thought maybe because I started to do work before I eat anything but today, I do eat something...but it is still happening...It was already the third time and I was really freaking out if I were to collapsed - this never happened in my life though...I was also thinking of my low blood pressure or low HB count, but the blood test result showed that I am all right, my HB count is still safe but i'm not sure how about now since i did not take any supplement to maintain my HB like last time. I was told by the midwife that here, they don't supply iron to pregnant women and instead advice me to eat balanced diet and take multivitamin which i've been taking at my own cost..-nasib baik xmahal beb-

Tomorrow I'll be having my anomaly scan and i guess the final scan in UK, sorry baby, mommy will not give birth to you in the UK..:)..Your daddy doesn't want to...I hope my baby will all fine. I just bought the prenatal heart listening system, and I just listened to the tiny heartbeat yesterday. It was really hard to get her heartbeat heard only her kicking can be heard loud. I bought the stuff secondhand though, from a mother of two who had one pair of boy and girl...hope I'll get a girl this time...but i don't want to so much high hope though...whether she or he...I'll accept as is...because he/she is my child....
Angelcare nappy disposal system

I also bought few more baby stuff in addition to what we already have where I find appropriate because I know, in KL, it is really hard to find them..at a cheaper price...:)..or..they don't sell it in KL...hahah...I am also planning to buy the TENS machine which will reduce (i hope so) the contraction pain during labor and i hope the private hospital allow this machine to be used in the labor room as i really hate the drugs being put in my body as i was really restless after labor last time due to consuming too much of drug while having contraction pain...
Prenatal heart listening system

Ape nk Update Tah???

Xtahu nak update apa...gambar2 kt laptop satu lg...mls nk copy masuk thumbdrive sbb thumbdrive pon dah penuh...

Skang, masa utk individual project. Tak start ape2 lagi. Just baca2 literature and kumpul literature dulu, most of them from SPE papers...kt mn lagi nk dig???Library??...Mmg saya ni xreti nk cari info kt library yg relevan dgn tajuk theses...lain yg dicari...lain yg jumpa...tp sy mmg dah ade target...walau pon target xgempak cam org laen....sy terpaksa kerana keadaan sy....sy hanya target utk lulus...cukuplah...Lulus2 pon kt sini...minimum C = 50% markah dia...utk dptkn Msc..fuhh..fuhh....lagi 2 bulan..tamatlah kehectican hidup as student cum wife cum mommy...mmg challenging sungguh and seriusly..mmg xsanggup dah nk redah the same situation again...i mean along with my husband also as student...but kalau phD, i think things will be different kot...it's more like mcm pergi kerja jugak....but taughtcourse Msc ni..dgn exam nyer...dgn project yg patut paling min...4 month...dicompress jd 2 months...dgn lectures lagi...fuhhh....seriusly...penat...non-stop..plus..no tour2 europe as i have alwyas dream off...then...imagine how much stress i endure for all this while kan....normally, kalau dulu2 la...stress study....i leh enjoy dgn frens...borak2 ke...tgk movie ke....dating ke...but now...sume xboleh...balik umah..kene jg anak...kene msk(ni slalu escape sbb pregnant)...well...there is no recess for me...and nk tulis blog pon kene cepat2..and sometimes...idea dtg ms tgh dok tepok2 anak nk tido..tp after that..lesappp....huhuhu...s ni jenis idea dtg xkira masa...bila dtg...kalau ade dpn pc..ok la...tp kalau dok atas katil...alamat nyer..mmg tergantunglah idea tu kt situ....huhuhuhu....

Perut saya ni..umur dh nk masuk bp eh..alamak...lupe dehh..18 weeks ke???....xcountdown pon....sbb dok busy bende lain..sian baby....tp alhamdulillah...spjg 2nd pregnancy ni...everything ok just mood swing, masalah angin yg biasa, alah pon sikit2...(frequency muntah yg jauh sgt berkurang dr fes pregnancy)..ubat pon xbyk...try gak mintak iron..sbb takut anemia...tp ritu wat test drh...ok jer...alhamdulillah...hrp2 ok la..mintak pil kalsium pon xkasi...balik2 di suh mkn multivit and mkn mknn seimbang....kalau g fes dulu...sume2 kasi...oh..lupa dehh...ade pil ikan xmkn2 lg...yikes...sy mmg xsuka mkn ubat....multivit pon dok escape2...hihihi....nnt next week lah start mkn pil ikan pulak...kang esok2...xbijak...slh ibu mengandung pulakkn....so..nk bg adil...kt abg mkn pil ikan...adik pon..mama mkn pil ikan..adil kan????

Si abg skang makin nakal...fuhh..thp kenakalan yg sukar dikontrol except digertakkn dgn perkataan "vacuum" atau "roary"..hahaha...die sgtlah takut dgr bunyik vacuum...mesti nk duduk dkt2 sy..peluk kuat2..haha..lg 1 kete control "roary" the car..kihkih..pslnyer kete tu boleh berckp...die cuak giler...nanges2 lagi....last2 jd toys papa dia....hihihi...papa die teringin kete control yg leh wat stunt tu....roary ni utk budak2 baru blajar main remote control...kihkih..beli pon sbb murah gilerrr...mmg sgt murahhh.....dr rege 20++ turun ke 2++..sape xnk beli beb....igt nk bli byk..tp dok pk...watpa dehh....anak sedare sejati kiterg...dah besar2 xsesuai....ni pon xtahu nk bli apa kt diorg ber-3 ni....mujur 3 jer....cukuplah anak sedara sejati je kan....hubby xtahu la...sbb die xde anak sedara sejati....lain feeling nyer.....anak sedara sejati ni...drh daging...:)

Skang duk terpk dah nama nk kasi kat baby ni...kalau GIRL lahh...hubby lak excited benor nk beli brg2 kelengkapan baby...mcm nk sambut fes baby jer..pslnyer die dok hrp baby GIRL tu...sy ckp xpyh...die nak jugak...pslnyer kt sini rege brg2 murah compare nk bli kt KL....antara yg dibeli...pushchair..ntah brand ape..sy pon xtahu lah...sy pulak dok cari carseat....mmg lama cari...utk si abg....kt KL nnt mmg kene letak die dlm carseat psl kt sini dah biasa carseat...takut kang die xkasi kete gerak selagi xpakai seatbelt...sbb mmg pernah terjd...die mrh papa die gerakkn kete ms die xpsg buckle lg...huhuh..

Haih...dah dicontinued la pulak cerita yg nak dicerita...huhuhu...smlm si abg nanges pulak mlm2...so..terpaksala mama die join sekaki tido....hihihi...si abg ni mmg...kalau mama xde seblah...mesti terbgn punyalahhh....anak manja.....pasni...xtahula...camna jadiknyer bila ada adik sok....hrp2 ok ler....

OH ya...ada cdgn nama x..mula dgn huruf A...2 suku kata...nama iringan pon...paling byk..3 suku kata....ehehe....tu xkisah huruf apa pon...hihihi...

Escaping....

Suddenly i feel sad as i knew i will not be going anywhere as i dream before. I cried by myself..it is really frustrating to me...I have wait so long to get this opportunity but end up I will be going to miss it...Is my feeling affected by my mood swings? I guess so...part of it..and it really worsen my day..how everyday...from the first day I arrived in UK, I always hope there will some times that i can have the europe tour as i always fantasize about...but now, I only can cry about it since I know it's not going to happen...i really..really feel sad...now I just realise...I should have spent my live to the fullest before i get married because i never expected that after marriage this would happen...my hobby, jalan2 is always get to halt everytime i plan for it...and it is always difficult for me to go for gathering or kenduri after the marriage...i envy my friends who are still have a life after marriage...and i really wish that things are going to change someday, but never now when.and can i be patient to wait????

Kawan atau Lawan???

Tajuk di atas bunyi macam kontroversi jer..hehe..Takde ape2 sebenarnye.Kali ni lari kejap dr tulis blog dlm bhs international sbb hr ni igt nk merapu sbb rs bdn mcm sebu semacam ajer.Apesal, xtahu la labu...labi mmg xtahu pasal die nk sebu tetiba ajer ms tgh duk sibuk2 edit report tadi. Sebu + lapar = kombinasi yg sgt xselesa beb. Rasa nk landing tang2 tu jugak. Tapi segan ler, sumo lelaki, dr pelbagai negara pulak tu.Ehehe..eh, terpesong pulak jln cerita..patut dpt C3 BM ms SPM dulu..mesti karangan BM terpesong jugak niehh...huhuhu..

Haaa..ni nk bukak satu rahsia yg terjadi pd sy yg sy xdpt nk clearkn kt org2 yg terlibat.Agaknye sy mmg tidak disukai kot ms tu (ngade2 kot, ntah, hilang ingatan sudah perangai sy camne lah ketika itu..tp apesal tah, sy rs sy OK..hahaha..xtahu la kot org ckp sy berlagak ke ape..nk berlagak ape yer..sy bukan anak org kaya, duit poket pon...huhu..adelah dlm wallet...RM10 jer...duit biru...jarang sekali..mungkin mulut terlalu direct..well, sy xreti ckp bohong...itu kelemahan sy ms tu...bhy xreti ckp bohong or mengampu...hihihi)..back to the story..

Alkisah di suatu mlm, di hujung minggu, kanak2 tingkatan satu di kamar dot dot sedang bersuka ria..jeng jeng..dah igt sampai situ jer...HAHAHA...serius..tp bersuke ria pon idakler sampai pakai seksi2 OK! (Kami dituduh oleh akak2 pengawas berkelakuan tidak senonoh..ntah..dr mn cerita tu dtg...pun xtahu...ni yg sy igt lah..igt2 lupa dah)...yg jelas dlm gambaran kt blkg kepala sy, kami cuma dancing and singing sambil adakan ala2 fashion show gitu utk bersuka ria..tup2 tak lama kendian...sy dipanggil oleh akak pengawas ting.5..berkenaan slh seorg rakan sekamar..pelik..sy disoal selidik...cey...bunyik mcm kene masuk balai polis jer kan..tp serius..sy diarah masuk ke kamar di mn semua ahli dlm kamar itu adalah pengawas...sy duduk dan disoal mengenai rakan sy itu...tiba2...kuar suatu label dr mulut slh seorg akak pengawas ni...dan serius...sy xigt sama ada sy setuju atau tidak dgn label itu..mungkin sy angguk agaknye sbb terkedu...ape yg disoal, sy jwp penuh jujur melalui ape pemerhatian sy dan evaluation sy terhdp rakan sy...xde ape pon..ala..budak2...rakan sy dituduh ala2 bossy gitu...(yeke, serius xigt..dan serius xigt camne kes tu leh sampai kt akak2 pengawas)..

Perenggan ke-2 pulak...sy jugak telah diperiksa thp kebersihan sy pd mlm itu..kalau lah tidak silap sy...sy menangis mlm itu sbb ketakutan kot...ntah..sy pon xigt...ke sy nanges sbb laen eh...sbb kakak angkat sy pengawas jugak dan turut berada di dlm kamar penyiasatan..balik2 jer...rakan sy tu pulak kene panggil kot...dan sy mmg xtahu cerita tp esoknye atau hari2 slps2 itu...telinge nipis sy terdgr rakan yg dipanggil itu bercerita dgn ahli kamar berjiran across tembok..dan sy dgr segalanya dgn jelas..udah tu dok sedap mengumpat kt katil atas sy..haha...konpom2 la dgr..kut ya pon...pi la mn2 bilik ka...ha..wat conference kt situ...maklumkn pd satu tingkatan...kihkihkih...no offence..budak2 skolah...jgn wat gini ya...mengumpat tu berdosa...:P...ms tu..hati sy sedih...sbb mmg rakan sy itu telah slh sangka pd sy dan menyebarkn fitnah pd sy...sejak dr itu..sy terasa sy dipdg jelik oleh kesemua rakan setingkatan sy dan self esteem sy terus jatuh bedebuk...di awal sy tingkatan 1..sejak dr itu, sy xnak masuk campur bila ade bab2 menghasut or mengumpat sgt sbb sy takut bende yg sama jd pd sy...tp sebenarnye...bende itu terus berlaku sms sy ditingkatan 3 pula....hehe...jgn igt sy xtahu yer org2 berkenaan...sy tahu...sy mmg dpt syak sbb ia nya sgt lah obvious dan sy sgtlah pelik, sbb sy xganggu kamu malah, sy xde pulak mengada2kn cerita...tp mmg pelik..agaknya kelakuan sy terlalu "kiut', dan kamu xsuka kot..tp..ade org laen...lagi 'kiut' kelakuan dia..kamu tak ckp apa2 pon....pelik2...apa slh sy ms tu..sy pon confuse...tp sy biarkan sbb xpenting..PMR lg penting..hihihi.., tp kenape kamu membuat cerita ttg sy...adakah kerana cerite rekaan kamu tu boleh dijadikan filem???..kalau kamu buat betul filem tu...dan dpt sambutan meluas...jgn lupa ya...kasi tips sama sy....hahaha...

Saya bukan nk nk perli atau apa2..sbb ade antara reader adalah rakan skolah sy...sy dgn rendah hati telah memaafkan org2 di atas..cume perkara itu segar di dlm ingatan sy kerana, hidup sy sentiasa diduga..dan skg pon sy sdg di duga, usahlah dity dugaan apa...biarlah menjadi rahsia diri sy...tp tiap kali sy diduga..sy pasti terigt dugaan yg lps...dan menyoal diri...kenapa sy diduga...apa slh sy??..sy sentiasa muhasabah diri...adakah sy telah melakukn kesilapan terhdp manusia lain??..danbila sy xdpt jwpn kpd soalan mengapa itu...hati sy merintih..sedih...kenapa sy tidak dianugerahkn kegembiraan di saat sy sgt perluknnya...

setiap dugaan mmg tersemat di kalbu..xkira di mn2...setiap sesuatu tu ada hikmahnya..dan sy hrp jika2 perkara ini sampai kepada org2 itu, mintak clear lah...dulu kamu telah slh anggap kpd rakan kamu sendiri dan membiarkn rakan kamu berasa sedih terhdp tindakan kamu....sy sedih...dan sy terus sedih...tp sy redha...sy xdpt kecap nikmat bersahabat...tp sy hargai saat2 hipkorit itu kerana saat2 itu, telah pon mewarnai hidup sy...dan telah membuat sy tersenyum dgn sendirinya betapa kebudaknnya kita pd waktu itu...tp sygnya...sehingga hari ni...sy masih merasa jauh...dgn sahabat2 semua...kerana...sy sentiasa merasa kamu masih anggap sy masih spt itu...dimn itu bukan sy.......

Ampun maaf telah diberi ya..saja nk meluahkan psl rs sebu...ape kaitan ehh?????

Tagged!!

1. Copy badge “Blogger Friendship Award” di atas untuk diletakkan di blog anda.

2. Link/ceritakan kembali siapa yang memberikan award ini kepada anda

Saya ni bukan reti main tag2 ni...ada 1 lagi rsnya berhutang dgn seseorg..hehehe..maklumlah sibuk study la konon...(study ka???)..Award ni telah dianugerahkan (eceh..) oleh along aka sitilina aka mommy lyna (xpnah sy memanggil nya gini...huhu...) seorg supermummy yg telah mendahului saya dr segi bilangan anak....seorg yg terlalu byk idea utk mengaranag sehingga saya merasakan beliau layak menjadi penulis tersohor suatu hari nnt...(konpom kembang kuncup along nieh...ini cubaan utk merapu di kala kemualan dtg melawat nieh...ehehe)...nk kenal dgn lembih lanjut..sila la lawat blog ALONG...

3. Setiap blogger mesti menyatakan 10 fakta/hobi diri sendiri sebelum memilih penerima award seterusnya (anda di-tag)

Adeh, ini ygsusah saya nk ceritakn sbbnya saya pon xkenal diri saya betul2 sbbkn sibuk menjaga sang putera yg sedap berdengkur diseblah saya ketika ini..hrp2 die xbgn menggaru lg pd mlm ini..

1. Saya makan byk...tp xgemuk2..hehe..kenapa ya???..oleh itu, xrugi kalau belanja sy mkn sbb sy suka mkn...dan mknn xakan terbazir...saya pasti akan cuba menghabiskn nya...hehehe....

2. Saya xsuka bau asap rokok...pening kepala...xbaik utk kesihatan...meneyesakkn dada...oleh itu..perokok2...sila jauhkn diri anda drpd sy kalau tidak mahu hati sakit yer...i'll be so annoying dgn smokers actually disbbkn xthn bau rokok itu....

3. Saya sgt suka mkn laksa...tp mesti sedap dan kene dgn tunas rasa lidah saya...ehehe...

4. Kenapa sy kawen muda???...hehehe...ini adalah cita2...sbb sy nk ibu muda yg meletop...(boleh ka???..rs xmeletop lgsg...selekeh adalah..horror jaa...huhuhu)..tambahan sy berhrp anak2 sy jugak kawen muda spy sy dpt bergelar nenek muda yang cun....ehehe..perasannye!!!!

5. Saya ade byk minat yg sy nk lakukan tp masih tidak dpt melakukn..kenapa ya???..masa...yaa...masa byk dihabiskn menguruskn anak dan rumah (rumah dh mcm tongkang pecah pon...)..antara minat sy...menjahit...melukis...berangan..(ni slalu la...)

6. Ish..byknyer 10...baru ke-6...nk wat fakta2 tertentu...xreti pulak..hish..ha...sy sebenarnya seorg yg gugup...cara cover..xdelah mintak excuse ke tandas..tp sy akan tersenyum2...tersipu2...ehehe...especially bila kene ckp omputih...sy sgt gugup..sbb itu bukan mother tounge saya...saya belajar english merangkak2...sampai ke university pon masih begitu adanya...maka..level of confidence...tersgtlah low disbbkn saya xspeaking dirumah..cma skang je..speaking siket2 dgn anak saya sbb die skolah omputih...maka kene ckp omputih jugakla...

7. Saya pnah berciat2 nk jadi ustazah..tp seolah2 terkubur setelah kesukaran menempatkn diri di sekolah agama sbb ms sy sekolah rendah...semua sy uruskn sendiri...ibu bapa saya kurang arif bab2 ni...jadi..sy hanya mengikut arus...dan hari ini adalah hasilnya...

8. Saya anak bongsu, tp saya bukan anak manja...sy blajar independent sejak dr tadika dan sy anak yg paling kurang menyusahkn ibu bapa(perasan tuuu)...sy sgt bersyukur Allah permudahkan jln sy utk ke hari ini tanpa menyusahkn ibu bapa saya dari segi kewangana dan tenaga....

9. Saya sgt lapar ketika ini...tp mls hendak mkn..camna tu yer????

10. Yey...yg terakhir...sy sgt malas lipat baju...tolong lipatkn baju...

4. Anda perlu memilih 6 penerima award seterusnya dan menyatakan nama mereka di blog anda.

Oleh sbb xramai pon reader blog nih...so..diorg je lah kene award...kalau dh kene bende alah ni..xyahla buat...saya ikot syarat jer..nasib baik 6 jer...kalau 10???..aduh..mana nk add lagi ni...hahaha.....sy bukan nyer blogger aktif pon....baiklah..kawan2...kalau korang free..buatlah..xfree...jgn paksa diri...xminat...pon xpe...saya menurut perintah jer....

1. Kak Asmida
2. Lilly
3. Kak Mazidah
4. Che Ah
5. Shazzy
6. Mira

Selamat membuat tag kalau rajin...haih..dh lapar...nk mkn...tp mengantuk...tido lg sedap....hihihi...

Macam2...

This week is really a something to me. First, this week is really essential for me to come up with reservoir properties from my petrophysical analysis. Being an inexperienced petrophysicist, i hardly find confidence in my analysis, however, i have to make my data looks confidence and therefore i have put several assumptions to simplify the matters. It was really a tiring work to understand the software and how it works best for my data which i need to refer to many other friends where they are located in different building and it was really tiring since my condition now is not the usual me. Even the weather is already sunny but breezy, i still wear coats to keep warm as i really can't live in cold weather, not like my son, he never wears his coat now after returning from nursery. And yes...the day is longer that the night of course..and imagine...at 5 am, it looks like 7.30 am in Malaysia..and 8.30 pm looks like 5.00 pm in Malaysia..dear oh dear..i heard that in July it's going to be worst...really can't wait to return home!

Last Tuesday, i had my first ultrasound in edinburgh. It was really far to get to the royal infirmary. We arrived quite early and the hospital really looks grand with some outlets inside and restaurants...it's actually a brand new hospital i guess..and yeah we just got in for scan for 10 minutes or so because everything was normal and I'll comeback for another scan when i reach 20 weeks pregnancy..i only got 1 picture from the scan result..but i was really glad seeing her gently dancing inside her sac and she already got her hands and feet. She actively moving through the scanning procedure. Now, she is 44mm long and my EDD will be on 27 November 2009 which is a relief for me as i got ample time to recover before getting busy for my bro's wedding, hopefully...

The next day, i had a visit to geological core store to look for my rocks. I mean, how does it looks like in real despite relying solely on printed reports that i have. My team core was 60 m long and i only brought 1 well core data with me as i thought, there would be only one core only. After all, I wasn't really know what to look at as i am really blunt in geology and even the terms such as stratigraphy, sedimentation etc always make me confused..but i do love nature, i love to learn how they formed and the ancient story behind it, but with the little knowledge that i have, i'm positive, that my story will be laughed by the experienced geologist..:P..i went there with my geologist...and actually i can't really work with him..it just i don't believe in his saying..haha..i dunno..i guess my wavelength does'nt aligned with him..but still, i need to work closely with him...

And today, i went to visit my assigned midwife, she is very nice and sweet lady, talks very soft and kind. I think it is really far different with our Malaysian government society. I can say, they are rude, hardly smile to greet you and makes the people around afraid of them..i dunno what the purpose of their bad attitudes anyway...here, people are very friendly regardless whether you are foreigner or not. I think that is why more people loves to migrate to western as the western people are more open and welcoming. Asian, I am not sure about my neighbouring country, i just can comment about my own country, it is quite shameless as the government staffs are not friendly and seems like they always work under pressure. Or maybe because of our hot weather that makes hot tempered human??? i dunno..but the private can give smiley and warmth greetings...why not the government...i really hopes..the new generation of government servants will employ best attitudes ever...i really hope...only one thing that make me sad...is...our salary...is not at par as any other country even our neighboring country...i just asked a friend of mine...and he said...fresh grad was paid by their NOC..around 1k pound...my salary??? even i have worked for 3 years plus...still not reaching 1k pound.....pathetic huh??? and please don't compare with the government pay..must be much lesser than mine..i guess...

OK, back to my midwife story...i was interviewed on my background and previous pregnancy.And also, my blood was taken for several tests and she did asked me to think about spina bifida/down snydrome test..which at first i dont want to do it as i really hate to donate my blood for tests...it was really hurt..since she did not wipe with spirit before putting in needle and vein is really small and she tried two times with different arms..and it was really scary when she put in the needle and still hurt when my blood is drained...i think, there was 6 tubes altogether...and when she took my weight..it was 41 kg..she said my BMI is too low..yes..i always know that..no matter how much i eat..i always failed to upgrade my BMI..and due to that..she said, i will be having monthly scanning to monitor my feotus weight..hehe..i like this as i can my bb more frequent...next scanning will be on my 15 weeks....:)..and..probably on 20 weeks...and i think...26 weeks or so..before i fly home...and it just about time to fly home as she said..my pregnancy must be around 28 weeks or less to enable me to fly....and..according to her estimation...i in the midst of 27 weeks..or else..i'm going to have a scottish bb..hihihi...if there is a need...i may adjust my timetable..so i can come home early...

Petrophysics..

I always wanted a perfection in what ever am doing but it will never be perfect. I always willing to contribute something to the people that really hope something from me but it always a dead end at the beginning and takes time for any contribution..but this time, time is really limited..i am still don't really know what i'm supposed to do..it's not that i'm escaping from the role that has been given to me but, with the weak condition of myself, the least motivation that i have now make me blunt and can't think straight of the steps that i should've taken.

I'm glad that i'm in the group of people where most of them are really talented in the area they're belongs to but am worried if i can't fulfill their target. It's not that i'm not cooperating well but seriously, honestly, with zero experience in this field, i really can't imagine the real thing i need to do. With very minimal guidance (only from books and asking friends who are also don't really know), i'm afraid i can't meet the objective. I've started thinking that my decision to do petrophysics is a big mistake but that is what i want to be when i get back to the company because i feel that is the simplest job i can do after reservoir, drilling or what ever which i am not good at (i don't get good marks for the rest of subjects)..but, when come to application...i am stucked..my previous lecture which is also a petrophysicist was gone to other university and left behind the academician which are very busy at the moment..and i'm not confident of their capabilities to guide me..but i will try to approach them and hopefully they will give a useful guidance of what petrophysicist should do....

He doesn't eat FISH!

Not everyone of my friends or relatives know about this..my dear hubby doesn't eat FISH..how did i deal with it for the past 3 years??

Because of we are working couple..there's not much of it...since only dinner that i've to cook...and i really don't go with cooking that much..because...i am restricted not to cook any kind of fish cooking in the house or my hubby will be fussing around for the whole night...and spoiled my appetite..so...i only cook chicken and beef...other than that...most of the time...we just bought at nearby restaurant...or eating out...where i can order out anything that i wanted...haha..this is become my favorites...or looked after everyday...however...eating out or TAPAU will be boring if it is too often...so...i've to cook as well and my cooking is not always do well...because i don't do cooking that much before i get married..

So, since he doesn't like fish...my best time for eating...is when we eating out...or during lunchtime at office...i have the freedom to choose the dish that i want...and also...when i am at my parent's...my mom always know what i want to eat....but..i'm still learning to cope with the situation...and i hope i have the extra strength to do it...it just that, i'm easily get tired after cooking too much of thing...and that is why i don't do cooking or in other work..i don't like to cook everyday because it tiring and i'm not satisfied as i always prepare 1 hour for cooking..so what i can cook within 1 hour???..only 2 dishes...and of course must be his dishes...and am never get the satisfaction when cooking at home....i really hope that my hubby will eat fish as i do...it's really difficult to change people mindset...he says fish HANYIR...but i think..chicken pon HANYIR as well...not to say prawns, squids...etc....

60% completed..Alhamdulillah...

Yesterday marked the finishing line of my "examinable material". However, I am not sure if after this, there will still be any other exam that i;ll be going through in my life.This time around was the very hardest in my life..Why i say so, because i didn't do much of study like i always do..Why didn't i??..It's all because my health..However, I'm glad since I did not panic during exam and still can think what I'm supposed to scribble in my answer papers...this is really surprisingly...I've never experienced this before...I tried to be optimistic as I could that the examiner will be much of generous when marking mine and a PASSED is already a big success for me..Well, that what you will do when you're least expected....Aminn...

Thinking how i went through those time, i don't think i can go through it again. It was really a big challenge for me..and this Msc really thaught me of life survival..And i'm grateful I done my degree in UTP instead of overboard..yeah..I guess I am truly Malay...can't live well at any other places...because my favorites are the malays dishes...owh...i'm drooling for it very badly now actually....

Yeah..I'm glad even though i really hate this Msc stuff because it never make me feel easy though...there's always incoming work...i never get to go for vacation outside UK because of it...i guess that make me feel worst...because i really enjoy vacation...and that's why i chose to study here...to get a little vacation away from Malaysia...(that's my secret on the reason...let only ME know why)..However, deep in my heart, there's a bit of frustration because i can't get the 'distinction' as i always dream of..i know..because my past exam didn't do that good...just average...and this time around...with the sickness i held for weeks...i just hope for a PASSED in every subject...and moreover...the exams carries 60% of total Msc...If I get A for projects...I don't think it would help me...

Inspite of that...a gift from Allah came to me...and that is why I endured all the sickness, stressed because of the greatest gift i've always wish for..and I am very pleased of it...and really THANK YOU ALLAH for granting my DOA...that is what meant by when you're least expected...I hope everything goes smoothly here...getting pregnant at people place is not the same as at my own place...in KL most probably, i can get my first scan by now..at the most prestige hospital with the very best gynae..here, i need to follow the government style of pregnancy care which is a new experience to me...but i hope, i still can deliver in KL...inshaAllah...hopefully everything goes well..

And of course, i kept thinking how's my baby doing..because i never see HER(i don't know..but i hope for a SHE)...last time...i almost dropped a tear when first i see the heartbeat..this time..a bit tougher for me to handle a cheeky toddler around who is always want me to be on his side...and a husband that is bit fussy...my study...and of course my self...i really don't like the weather here now...because it's chilly and I don't like to go to the kitchen because it is very chilly...and I am very sensitive to some odor in the kitchen..which it appears and sometimes dissappears..and unlucky me...my hubby is not a chef...he doesn't like to cook..just eat...if I'm in KL it will be much easier..since there's lots of restaurant around my area with tasty foods...that is why to calm myself...i kept thinking how the good the food i ate before...i imagining that i return to the past..."what a fool i am"...yeah...even i can find the ingredient..my cooking will never taste good since my tounge has lost its sensitivity...i've always taste plain everytime i eat...

THIS IS REALLY A BIG CHALLENGE...HOPE IT WILL GO AWAY IN A QUICK TIME...AMINNN